What Am I Grateful For? | November 2015

Heyo!  Happy November! I haven't posted much this month, and I'll tell you all why in a few days once I can actually sit down and gather my thoughts, but I felt like I needed to express myself so here I am! It is the day before Thanksgiving, and whether you consider it a holiday, this time of year often creates waves of thankfulness and care that spread throughout the nation, and that is something everyone should believe in! Yay! I've definitely been feeling very grateful for life recently, and I'd like to share with you the things that have been making me smile. :) 

1. My family and friends. I have had a troublesome few weeks and honestly I'm not sure what I would've done without them. I am a natural born worrier, and any feelings of tranquility that I have had within the last month have been because of them. A huge shout out to the universe for giving me such amazing humans to surround myself with..I owe you big time. 2. Feeling okay. This is one that hasn't been applicable until last night, which is exactly why I am putting it on this list. For the first time in a while, last night I came home from work, took of my makeup and had a nice chat with my sister, and felt okay. It was quite lovely. 3. Love. This is one that I haven't even ever experienced until now, and ohmylanta its been wonderful. I used to read books and get all fluttery at the idea of being loved by someone, and although theres no in love-ness happening yet, it feels pretty wicked that it could happen. *crowd awwwwww's*

because im cute af 4. BLOGGING. Where would I be without this random web page of makeup and feelings? Probably nowhere. Thanks blogger! 5. Art. I have been sketching and writing music a lot more lately, and I'm just very happy that I have all of these creative outlets for when times get tough. 6. My jobs! I have 2 jobs, as a guest services representative at a Hilton hotel and a beauty advisor at Ulta, and I'm very lucky for both of them! I absolutely love working in customer service, ensuring people have a good holiday and that they feel their best while doing so is an amazing blessing.
7. I feel safe. I have very bad anxiety, and often times I do not feel safe in unfamiliar surroundings. Since it has snowed pretty heavily in Chicago this past week, I have been confined to my home, my jobs, and a few friends' houses...and although it has been a bit discouraging staying home I have felt very safe, which I think is very important when you are going through something.  and last but most certainly not least....(I think you know where this is going) 8. YOU!  If you are reading this right now, thank you thank you thank you! It is because of you that I have the opportunity to happily live an expressive life. Yay! What are you thankful for?

credit to the artist/tumblr

Being Awkward & MEETING DAN AND PHIL!

Heyooo!!
Back again today, and IM SO EXCITED FOR THIS POST. But before I start, show of hands...who is a fangirl? *raises all limbs* Everyone? Perfect. If you are an average fangirl, or at least have a bit of insight into fangirl culture, then you know what it is like to see or meet your favorite band, musician, actor, or in my case, YouTuber. Its fun! But if you're me.. the experience itself is 25 percent excitement, 10 percent happiness, and 65 percENT COMPLETE AND UTTER HUMILIATION AT HOW RIDICULOUSLY AWKWARD I AM IN EVERY ASPECT OF LIFE. GAH!

So before I get into my adventure to meet Dan and Phil, let me give you a bit of a background on my awkward-ness. I wasn't always an awkward human, there was a time in high school when I could hang out with friends and make jokes and be a normal person. And then...college happened. I started doing things and going out and I realized that the normalcy I thought I had possessed wasn't even a thing and that in the real world I cant even form a sentence without causing the poor person conversing with me to feel uncomfortable. Anybody relate? Yeah. BUT, I have found a solution, and I will share it with you. 
This may come as a shock, but the best way to deal with being awkward is...
to accept it!

Go with the flow, man! Every situation needs at least one awkward kid to knock everyone down a few pegs, or things will get boring! Let being awkward be a part of you, you'll feel much better about it, I can promise that. 
Okay, now that I have given you some life-changing advice, *hair flip* lets get on to Dan and Phil! If you aren't familiar with them, they are hilariously lovely YouTubers from the UK, and they have recently released a book! I've only read a little of it so far, but its fantastic and I am totally going to enjoy finishing my *signed* copy.
(If you're interested in watching the videos of these crazy guys, their individual channels are Danisnotonfire and AmazingPhil, but they also run a joint channel called DanAndPhilGAMES which I highly suggest you check out because it is a beautiful, time wasting abyss that I fall into multiple times a week. Just saying.)  For the interest of a comedic blog post, I will share with you the actual dialogue I shared with Dan and Phil. Please go easy on me, it was my first meeting-my-favorite-YouTubers experience lol.

i think god forgot to give me self awareness

I went to meet them with my friend Abby, (remember her from my post about Internet Friends?) and Phil said her sweater looked warm..it was basically the highlight of both of our lives, lbh.

YAY! So there you have it kids! Whenever you have any chance to meet any of the people you look up to, I highly suggest you go for it even if you're as awkward as me, because it was the most fun I had in a long time. 

Awkward encounters and YouTube celebrities,

Body Positivity || Em's Corner

Hello people of the Internet,
My name is Emily Peters and my dear friend Brooklynn has asked me to do a guest blogpost for this lovely blog and I am super excited to be sharing my thoughts with you all today!

So let's get this party started!

Our topic for today is... Drumroll please... BODY POSITIVITY!
When Brooklyn asked me to share my thoughts on the subject I was so honored. I have struggled a VERY long time trying to accept myself for my body shape and weight. It has taken me just as long to feel even the slightest bit comfortable in my own skin. But now, at 18 years of age, I am happy to say I have finally learned how to accept myself and I think all of you beautiful people need to learn that as well! Because YOU, yes you, ARE BEAUTIFUL.

So, where do I begin? I think the easiest place to start is, well, the beginning. (WARNING TRIGGER TOPICS BELOW)

Since about the age of 10 I have struggled with body dismorphic disorder. (if you don't know what body dismorphia is, it is a disorder where one believes they are much "bigger" than they really are.) I have also struggled with bulimia as well as anorexia and binge eating. I have been swimming competitively for 10+ years now and swimming, as many of you know, is a pretty "revealing" sport. Swimmers are expected to be in tight one pieces day in and day out amongst our peers,  revealing just about everything to the naked eye. In a swim suit, every little flaw is out on display for the world. If you have stretch marks, scars, cellulite, you name it, in a swim suit it's going to be all out on display for the world to see. I felt different than my friends... much larger. I started hating how I looked from a very, very young age. Sometimes, even at the young age of 10, I would spend hours upon hours in front of a mirror staring at every little part of my body. Every surface of reflective material became a judgmental place for me to stare at my body and pick it apart. Sometimes, even walking to a store in the mall, every shop window we would pass would become another place for me to reaffirm my flaws.
So you're probably sitting there thinking, "EMILY, THIS IS SO NEGATIVE THIS IS NOT BODY POSITIVE AT ALL".

Oh contraire, Pierre(s)! My little story will take a turn soon, don't you worry your pretty little minds.

Around the time I turned 14, things got even worse. The idea of impressing boys (*shrieks hysterically*) started coming into play. On top of trying to love myself, I was constantly trying to impress the other gender. Every day I would worry about what boys thought of me. I saw all of my friends getting into relationships, having herds of boys wanting to text them, but here I was single and attempting to mingle and wondering, "Am I not good enough? Not pretty enough? Am I too ugly? Too fat? Is there something about my teeth?" I thought of almost every question in the book, trying to figure this out. I was cutting, spending nights upon nights crying to my mom that I would never get married, that I was too ugly and not good enough. I was feeling hopeless, insecure, not worthy. And all this time I was mysteriously gaining weight little by little for no reason, making matters even worse. (I realize now that it was probably because of all the stress I was putting myself under.)

By the time I turned 16, my family started to notice how all of this was taking a tole on me. My mom took me to a psychiatrist and they diagnosed me with depression and anxiety disorder, as well as bipolar disorder. I was put on medication and slowly things started to turn around.

Throughout that time that I was worrying about what others thought of me and what I thought I looked like, I forgot to love myself.

Learning to love myself has been a very long journey. I have slowly started to really learn exactly how I want to convey myself to my peers.

And what I want to be known as is just plain simple: I want to be known as Emily.

I started doing what I wanted. I would talk freely about my One Direction fan account even through the glares of others because, who cares? I love One Direction and I could care less what any of you think. I will happily belt out the words to Steal My Girl and What Makes You Beautiful any day around anyone.

I also started wearing what I wanted. I wear crop tops and high waisted shorts. I wear leggings, tight jeans or big baggy sweaters, because these clothes make me feel GOOD. Sure some people might say with my muscular body type that these types of clothing would not fit right, but heck, I love my stupid pair of ripped up high waisted shorts and my black crop top. I feel sexy, empowered, and BEAUTIFUL. Who cares what others think of what you want to wear? All that matters is that YOU like what you're wearing and YOU feel confident doing it.

So in summary here are three quick things I want to say to sum up this blog post...

1) Wear what makes YOU feel confident. It doesn't matter what it is. It could be sweatpants, skinny jeans, that old washed away Fall Out Boy tee that you've worn so many times its starting to smell like a permanent sweat stain... (GUILTY AS CHARGED) It shouldn't matter what it is. If you feel confident in it, then wear it. Who cares what others think? You feel good and that's all that matters.

2) Don't let others (specifically boys or girls) be the judge of your self worth. I thought the opinions of the boys around me were the only thing that could validate my beauty. But they weren't. And they shouldn't have been. Every time a boy would say "oh you're cute", yes, it was nice and it made me feel good, but it was temporary happiness. I still thought the same way of myself even with those compliments. So of course, say thank you to whatever compliments may come your way, but also brush off those rude comments. Having a boy/girl or not having a boy/girl does not determine who you are or your self worth. Society has taught us that if you're "single" you're probably ugly and forever alone. Or that if you've had multiple partners you're a "slut". But guess what? Neither of those things are true! Everyone is worthy enough and beautiful! Don't let others' opinions of you determine how you should feel!

And 3) SMILE. I know this is quite simple, and you're probably like "Emily I thought you were going to have another philosophical point!" But really my last point is as simple as one word!! A smile is the most beautiful part of a person. It shows happiness and pure joy! There is nothing more beautiful than a person beaming from ear to ear!! So do what makes you smile! Whether that is dancing like a maniac, blasting the Jonas Brothers as you sing along, painting, sculpting, writing, BLOGGING! Whatever makes you feel happy, DO IT. Because once you start doing happy things, you'll start feeling happy on the inside too.

Thanks for listening to me ramble today! I hope you feel a little more confident after reading this and I hope you are starting to feel BEAUTIFUL.

That's all for now!

Peace, love, and Harry Styles.

Signing off,

Em
_________________________________________________________________________________

About the Author 

Emily Peters is a freshman at Minnesota State University studying advertising and public relations with a minor in marketing. She currently runs a blog of her own, and can often be found at swim practice or listening to the latest from One Direction, Nick Jonas, Demi Lovato and 5 Seconds of Summer. She prides herself in the amazing friendships she has formed, and her creative writing. You can find her posts here on That Brooklynn Paige on Mondays, or on Twitter and Instagram at @mylifeasem1 -- Isn't she great?! Watch out for her!

Your "Purpose" In Life || Insightful Saturday

Heyooo!!!! How is everyone? It's been a rough few days for me. Between roommate squabbles and work work work, I am SUPER grateful to be able to just sit down for these few minutes and talk to you all. You know when you don't express yourself properly for a while and you start to feel like you'll explode? That's where I am right now, so thank you all so much for sticking with me through my mini rants. I love you guys.  This post today is about "purpose", whatever that truly means. I feel like modern society is becoming accustomed to this routine that everyone's purpose is to go through school, go to college, get a good, stable job, and save money to pay for your children to do the same thing. While that is a very safe route, I have found that it is becoming increasingly difficult for all of us with artistic souls to find solace in that situation. I personally have bounced around back and forth between jobs, majors and living situations because, to put it lightly, I get bored easily! It is so hard for me to stick to one thing, as I want my life to be a constant whirlwind of new and exciting experiences. Luckily, blogging has fallen into my lap, and I now have a way to document how I feel about all of these experiences, and maybe one day I'll find a way to narrow them all down until I have one career.  But for now, I am a wanderess, and I think I am okay with that. :)

"Brooklynn, how can blogging be your "purpose"? You're not even contributing to society. You really think that is better than being a CEO???" Wooow, thank you so much everyone I have ever met ever, that is a great question. Yes, I do think that blogging is a better opportunity for myself than being a CEO. But, get this... ....everyone is different! Blogging is a better option, FOR ME. I'm not sure what percentage of my readers are higher ups in major companies, but if you are, that's lovely! My point is that there is merit in whichever career you choose, because even if it isn't directly benefiting someone you know, you are always inspiring someone. (Of course there are exceptions to this. No, I do not think prostitution or drug dealing are acceptable career choices, I just think everyone can do anything they set their mind to. Please keep those exceptions out of my comments, lol.)

Take this photo, for example, as a visual representation of the differences between someone who chooses a life of logic vs. a life of creativity. Both are beautiful. Both are necessary. Both create amazing things. They are just different. But, in my opinion, there are three very important things to remember when trying to discover your "purpose", no matter what path you choose: 1. You were given an array of skills and talents that no one else has. No one else can do anything exactly the same as you. So its okay if your purpose isn't to be a doctor or lawyer, because what's really important is that you use your special talents to build a life that you love. (for example, I am good at talking. My family has joked about it for yeaaaars. BUT here I am, doing just that, and loving it.) 2. You don't need validation from others that your dreams and goals are important. Does it make you happy? Does it give you the life you want? Go for it.  3. It is okay to change your mind. It is okay to live your life one way and then decide that something else will make you feel happy and fulfilled. You can live the life you want, even if it takes time. It is okay to discover yourself through your passions! No matter what anyone says. You may be wondering what inspired me to write this, and it is simply that I have recently been trying to change my mindset. I feel as if I have been spending my entire life apologizing for who I am because it is an inconvenience to others, and I don't want to be that way anymore. I want to be who I am and if others don't like that, then maybe they don't need to be around me anymore. It is okay to like who you are, even if that isn't the person others want you to be. Your purpose will find you.

What is your passion? Love, light, and choosing happiness,

September Favorites! || Things I Love

Heyoo!!! How is everyone? Hope all is well in the blogdom today! I know it is way late, but today I am going to be sharing my *drumroll pleaaase* September Favorites! In case you're wondering, I'm currently with my pal Serena rehearsing for our show choir. Woo! We've just sat in Panera rearranging the song "You Need Me, I Don't Need You" by the lovely Ed Sheeran, and it is going well. Anybody know that song?  Okay, enough about restaurant musical endeavors, on to the favorites!

1. Rimmel Wonderlash Lift Me Up Mascara: I LOVE this mascara. Honesty time...I tried it because the packaging caught my eye, and I'm not sure I'll ever turn back. The formula itself goes on very smoothly (without clumps, important) and lasts all day without giving me the urge to start picking it off. The brush is huge, in an hour glass shape that allows you to reach all of your lashes. Recommend!!!! 
2. Sephora Baked Moonshadow Palette: I've been using this palette for a while now, and I think it'll always be a favorite. I am a huge matte fan, but this palette offers all of the shimmers I'd ever want, and I often brush them on over the matte ones from my NYX Dream Catcher Palette and it is just gorgeous.
3. So Delicious Coconut Milk Ice Cream: because ICE CREAM. (The cookie dough is my favorite)
4. Mason Jar Travel Cups: I'm putting this on here because my water intake has greatly increased in September specifically because I bring one of these with me every where, and for some reason, if I have water in my hand, I'll drink out of it, and with this I don't always have to buy plastic water bottles. Woo!
5. Blue Sky Journals: I have 3 of these now! I'm a bit of a journal whore, and I collect them and always have at least two with me at all times so I can jot down my thoughts. I love the cute designs that come on these, and all of the ones I have are thin and paperback and so easy to throw in my bag. 
6. L'Oreal Collection Privee The Perfect Nudes (JLo): I am so impressed with this! I have tried L'Oreal lip products in the past, and they usually aren't my go-to, but this nudie-pink is so creamy and its perfect for an everyday lipstick, it doesn't look too bold or too sophisticated. I look forward to buying more from this collection!
7. Jonathan Adler Pens: I was given one of these as a gift, and I just love it. Who doesn't love a nice, classy pen with a bright design? I know I do!
8. Pure Leaf Lemon Tea: I am ADDICTED to this. My dad's girlfriend drinks it like its going it out of style, and I've totally joined that party. I have like 12 in my fridge right now.
9. Cover Girl Professional Loose Powder (Transparent Medium): Okay, so I know some people don't think finishing powder is a necessity, or they use sprays, but it is a huge staple for me. I have a few translucent ones, and I have actually found that I love tinted, loose powders. This one is great! The packaging is a bit bulky, but it goes on nicely and you get a lot for the price.
10. "On My Mind" by Ellie Goulding: GUYS. ELLIE GOULDING IS MY QUEEN. THIS SONG IS SO GOOD. GO BUY IT ON iTUNES. RIGHT. NOW.

Pretty journals, pens and THE QUEEN..

Internet Friends || Stuff&Things

Heyo!!! How is everyone? Hope you are all swell :) I'm feeling very good today. Yesterday was a bit of a blech day, but watching a few Sprinkle of Glitter pamper videos fixed me right up! Today I am going to talk about what is probably my favorite topic so far: INTERNET FRIENDSHIP! Yeeeeee!!!  "Brooklynn, why are you so ridiculously excited about internet friends? Aren't those just rando's that you've never met who could be lying about their identity? Are you possibly talking to 90 year old creepers on twitter?????" 

As social media platforms become more and more popular, it becomes easier to make friends via the internet. In my opinion, this is an amazing chance for people around the globe to connect with one another in a way that those who lived hundreds of years before us could've never imagined. But, of course, like anything that seems to good to be true...there are those who use this as an opportunity to lie to others about who they are and that can become very dangerous. So, a quick disclaimer before I delve into the lovely world of internet friendship: be careful who you speak to on the internet, and be careful about who you become whilst twittering and instagramming away. 

I'll explain. While on the internet, it becomes so easy for us to change whatever we would like about ourselves. It becomes an escape of complex passwords and usernames that no one in our everyday lives could ever figure out, so it can be tempting to change little things about ourselves. I cannot stress enough: Let your internet presence be a wholehearted representation of yourself. If you are interested in making friends via the internet, this will be the easiest way to eventually transfer those web friendships to face-to-face ones. Now, this doesn't mean put all of your personal information online, but you can be honest about your personality.

literally me ^^^

Okay, now the fun part! I'm going to tell you a bit about some of my internet friends! If you read my post about Homecoming, you've seen a few pics of some of my internet friends. I have quite a few, but I've only met a handful in person. One of my best friends, Kristina, you'll be hearing a lot about within the next few months, as I recap my summer festivities with you all. I met Kristina on Twitter, and after randomly following each other one day, we got to talking via DM! (Remember this post where I mentioned voting for 5SOS to win an EMA? She was doing the same) We instantly clicked, and have been texting away ever since.  We met for the first time in August, and it was lovely. I miss her lots.

Kristina and I at the bean, we are v v cute. 

I am also currently in a group chat we like to call "5SOS Baes" (yes, we are that cool) and we had the opportunity to meet at a concert a few months ago! We have been friends for almost a year now, and let me tell you: meeting 7 of your most amazing friends all at one time is a very fun, overwhelming feeling! It was a big mesh of crazy hugging and crying and jumping for joy, and I know I have these ladies for life. Here are some photos of that experience! *heart eye emoji*

                            Our cute hands being cute                                    left to right: jess, em, ady, me, lau, meghan, abby, mags 

I'm so sorry for this

Okay, okay, I'm done now haha. But seriously, if you are perusing your favorite blog or see something funny on Twitter, say something! You never know the amazing people you'll meet, it really can change your life. And, if you are a little shy, I'd love to be your friend! Speak up! :)

Alsooooo, my friend Jess (she is to the far left of the first crazy group selfie) is a YouTuber herself! Check out her channel here! 

Crazy friends and a million crazier selfies,

Milani Eye Tech Perfection Liquid Liner Review || #MakeupMonday

Heyo!!

How is everyone on this fine monday? I'm doing great! I have to work tonight (blech, work work work) but it shouldn't be too bad. Happy #MakeupMonday! I'm really excited to start doing Makeup Mondays on this blog because if you are a makeup lover you probably know, mondays are very fun on social media. All of the beauty bloggers out there talk nothing but makeup with each other all day! Woo! It's very fun. Today, I will be reviewing the Milani Eye Tech Perfection Liquid Liner, a handy little boomerang shaped liner that I have heard nothing but good things about from the beauty world. 

It definitely lived up to the hype. I've been using it for a few weeks as my go to liner, and I really enjoyed it! My favorite thing about it is the felt tip, it feels almost as if you are sketching on your eyeliner, but it gives away a nice dark line without feeling too heavy. The end result reminds me a bit of the Almay Intense I-Color liner that I used a ton when I first started getting into liquid liners. 

The real showstopper here is the shape. It is made specifically so it fits perfectly in your hand, and no matter how shaky you are with your liner, it is easy to apply. My only issue with the shape was when I attempted to apply this to someone other than myself. It was quite awkward to hold, but the end result was still very nice. (And it is sooo easy to find in a makeup bag.) 

Milani is one of my favorite brands, and this liner definitely held up against the ones I would usually have floating around. It lasts fairly long, and doesn't smudge or smear, which was very important to me because I run back and forth a lot at work and there is nothing worse than looking in the mirror after a very busy few hours and seeing your liner all over your face. Its great, and I would definitely recommend it! 

What are some of your favorite liquid liners?

Pretty flowers and Milani..

Homecoming, WOO! || Stuff&Things

Heyoooooo!

How is everyone today? Hope you're all well! I am currently on the train back to my apartment, perusing Twitter and laughing at some silly selfies my friends have sent me from their homecoming dance festivities. I know I have quite a few readers who aren't from the US, so for you all, I'll explain a bit! Homecoming is a tradition carried out by many high schools and colleges throughout the nation, to welcome back students and residents to the school. It usually will include sporting events, parades, activities, and A LOT of school pride. In high school, there is also an annual homecoming dance, and if you've read anything on this blog at all, you'd probably be able to guess my favorite part: dressing up and wearing fancy makeup. Woohoo! But, I am no longer in high school (thank god) which means I have the oh so lovely opportunity to live vicariously through my sister and my younger friends. :)

Lets start with Jess and Abby *insert heart eye emoji x10*

Jess and Abby are two of my most amaaaazing friends! We met on Twitter, as we are all v in love with 5 Seconds of Summer. They are lovely <3 Hi girls!

I also have some more beautiful 5SOS friends who had their homecoming dances this month! (Mags and Meghan! Arent they gorgeous? *squeak*) 

Look out for more about these ladies in a post coming later this week about internet friendship. :)

Also attending the homecoming dance this year was my younger sister, Madisyn! She planned her entire homecoming dance alone (without any credit of course, ugh) and did an awesome job, and she looked beautiful!

So I know this is a bit of a random post (and it was very short) but this has been something fun I have been hearing about from my amazing friends, and I wanted to share this for them! What are some of your favorite homecoming or school dance memories? Leave them in the comments below!

Sparkles and high school dances, 

AHHHH BACK IN ACTION!

HEYOOOO!!!! Ohmygosh guys! Its been almost A YEAR since I last blogged!!! That seems very crazy. I have been updating my Tumblr, and using that as an outlet for my blogging needs, but there are a few reasons why I haven't been on here. (Gah! I'm sorry!) The biggest reason was probably a little teensy mental breakdown I had in November of last year. I basically convinced myself that I was going nowhere in life, and that having ONLY internet friends and sitting around my house doing makeup and Skype chatting wasn't helping, so I purged my internet presence a bit. I stopped blogging, vlogging, threw all my makeup away....it was a horrible nightmare that didn't help with anything. But I'm back for good. I've missed you all way too much to hold off any longer.  Sooooo now that I am beginning my venture back into the blogging kingdom (blogdom? I like it.) I have decided that I am going to set this goal for myself, 3 posts a week. I am very busy and I have a new-ish job that I'm sure you'll all hear all about, but I think this will be a good outlet for me. YAY! Well, thats all I have for this little "intro back to blogging/apology/excited" post, so I'll talk to you all soon!
Happiness, internet friends, and fresh starts..